In last Sunday’s post, I asked if anyone would like me to review The Love List for a closer look at the chapters. A few of you responded favorably, so here we go!
There are two things we should do daily to enhance our love relationship.
- First on the list is to take time to touch, if only for a moment.
Some people naturally hug and touch, but others don’t necessarily like touchy stuff. No matter the preference, we need to connect in this way each day.
Rewind your marriage journey in your mind to the most meaningful times. You’re likely to see that those times are etched into your memory due to the tender touch of your mate, holding hands, or a gentle squeeze of your shoulder.
This takes me back to the night HH and I met. At one point, we suddenly found ourselves surrounded on a crowded street. To weave our way through this crowd of strangers and not get separated, HH grabbed my hand to lead me. The memorable part was that he didn’t let go – even after we’d made it through to safety. (Sneaky, sneaky!)
Maybe you have a memory that’s similar. Gently touching your spouse while doing a routine task tells them that you’re there with them. They are not alone. This language often speaks more eloquently than words!
- Talk about touch. Do you come from a family of touchy types, or did your family members feel uncomfortable with touch? Discuss your touch meter – when and where you find it OK to touch. In public? In private? Holding hands is good? Not so good? What? Be specific. When is a good thing to know…when you need a neck massage – while leaning over a desk doing taxes? Right!
- Greet each other with love and interest when you see each other at the end of the work day. A hug and/or a kiss sets the tone for the entire evening.
- Catch a kiss – even on the run. The authors shared some great statistics – that those who kiss before leaving home for work miss fewer days of work due to illness each year. They have fewer accidents on their way to work. They also earn 20-30% more and live approximately five years longer. Kissing releases a hormone in the brain that elevates our mood. Hey! I’m sold! How about you?
- Number two on the list is to find something that makes you both laugh.
HH knows that’s why I married him – because he makes me laugh. Modern research shows that people with a sense of humor have fewer symptoms of illness.
A cheerful heart is good medicine. (Proverbs 17:22)
Humor can empower us to deal with horrendous circumstances. Refusing to take ourselves too seriously helps to keep things in proper perspective, even when we’re angry.
We need to take humor more seriously. If we pay attention to what makes our mate laugh, we’ll know better how to touch their unique sense of humor.
What things make your mate laugh that don’t cause a laughter response from you? Do they like sarcasm, dry wit, silly comic strips?
Actively participate in tickling their fancy in ways that speak to their humor. For example, if they laugh often at comic strips, clip one now and then to share with them. Engage yourself in entertaining their humorous side.
Even on spectacular Sundays, find ways to have a laugh with your mate! God created humor for us to relieve stress, help us sleep, and keep us sane. Laughter not only can save your life…it can save your marriage.